People I hate...
1. People who stand to close to me in line. If I can feel your
breath on my neck you are to close ! This creeps me out so bad, like are they
trying to see my information so they can kid nap me later ?
2 . People who say " your welcome" when I didn't say thank you.
Maybe there is a reason I didn't say Thank you maybe because I am not thankful
and you suck !
3. Women who complain or brag about their post baby bodies, before
their postpartum check up. You should be falling in love with every part of
your baby not worrying what you look like in the mirror!
4. People who think their stuff is better just because its Thiers .
like how their stock car will out run any other car. I guess them owning it gave
the car more horse power or something.
5. Girls who think they can't do something solely because they are a
girl ! You can't do it because you were never taught or you just didn't want to
learn. Gender is just a box we check on applications it doesn't choose what we
are capable of.
6. These people who go on crash diets and post about ever single
pound they lose but never say a word when they gain it back... if I had to read
about your kale shake and 10 mile walk to lose 3 pounds I want to hear about
your glass of Pepsi , your big Mac sandwich and how you gained 5 pounds ..
7. Anyone who thinks their way is the only way!... your way is best
for you but that doesn't mean its best for everyone!
8. People who believe in stereotypes and label other people... labels
are for soup cans not for people! My hair, clothing or type of music I listen to
doesn't define who I am ...
9. People who just show up at my house unexpected. I have 3 kids, I
need at least a 3 hour warning so I can scrap the gum off my couch and clean
the shit off the back of the toilet..(still have no clue how that
happens...)
10. People with no sense of humor. If you don't find it funny keep
your trap shut I don't need to know that you don't think its funny. Just let me
laugh , hell laugh along and we can laugh at each other !
...........and this people is why I have no friends....
Sunday, July 20, 2014
Thursday, July 17, 2014
Confessions of parents
I recently asked a group of parents a few questions to get some input for a blog I wanted to write, but what happen was far better.
The answers people gave me were very honest and they opened a part of themselves for me to see that I didn't expect. The fear of being judged out weighed the benefits of helping a friend. (ME!) I was moved by the emotion I read and heard in some of the answers . Each person I asked is different Some only have 1 child and some are raising a neighborhood of kids. Some are stay at home parents and some work 12 hour shifts. Some have small children and some have grand children. Some are financially stable and some struggle every day .. The one thing each one of them had in common is They all love the children in their lives.
Every single day of my life, but my mother reassures me that means I am a good parent. I second guess everything as for some reason, my brood did not come with instructions. It does get easier as they get older, even though it also gets more difficult."
"No I do not worry about being a good parent, I feel with everything I have been though in life, I make sure to provide and do for my kids."
" all of the time what parent doesn't? ? The Caseworker for my Foster children's tells me I'm doing a great job."
"No I was never scared of becoming a parent until my 2nd child was born 16yrs after my first! Things have changed a LOT in that time."
" I was not scared of becoming a parent. I was READY. I was ready to teach, learn, and experience life in a whole new way with my child. Every day is a blessing. The one thing I am scared of being a parent is because of death. I am scared of her leaving this earth. I am scared of me leaving this earth. I want to see her grow up. I want to see her go to school, college, get married, have children of her own. I want to be a grandmother. I want forever with her."
" I drank an 18 pack of beer the night my wife took her pregnancy test. We had been trying to get pregnant for 5 months and had stopped trying and decided to be traditional and get married first. She was late and her boobs hurt. I was terrified we would be pregnant and terrified we wouldn't be. The next ten months I really focused in on how "my story" was no longer about "me." That is an incredibly disheartening and terrifying prospect...until you meet your child and realize everything has changed in the most wonderful way."
"I said I would never be one of those parents who would cuss at or yell at my child. I am not proud of it but I am guilty. Damn she can really get me pissed off!"
"
letting her cry it out, she expects to be the center of my attention all the time and I still have to clean house and cook and work"
" Screaming and hollering at the kids all the time and cussing them"
" My ex-wife sometimes was not happy with the way I chose to punish our child. Its only because she never had discipline as a child and did not agree with it."
" Yes by my mom. For the non stop screaming etc"
" yes I was judged by a mentally ill narcissist who was looking for something ANYTHING to criticize me because she knows being a parent is the most important element to my life and to my self. She said I yell at my kids too much. I yell, it is true, but it is NOT in any way out of the ordinary or inappropriate or unreasonable."
" yes the drunk couple up the street that don't have any kids. They tell me I need to put my kids on a harness because I let them run wild. I let them play outside & ride their bikes up & down the street. I let them play in the street because our neighborhood is so quite the only peeps that come down our stretch is the people that live on my block. I let them draw with chalk in the street.. I am outside with them when they are out there.I don't let them disrespect others or their property so F- them assholes"
" yes I feel horrible when I let her cry it out and can't devotee 100% of my attention to her"
" I have gotten upset before and "blew up" before using my head. It was hard, but my child and I learned from the situation"
" She fell off the bed when she was three months. I found her struggling to stay above water when I forgot to turn the bathtub water off and turned away for a sec when she was around 2. That was a horrible what if moment. I have hurt her feelings when I am sarcastic with her on her duh moments. Sometimes I want to treat her like an older child and she isn't."
" I dropped the f bomb. Then dropped it again realizing I dropped it. I was not proud. "
"Yes. My daughter drew her fist back at me when she was 5 and my first reaction was to defend myself and I open handily smack her across the face."
" yes I have. We have been in a restaurant while the parents are pigging out & make their kids share a meal. Then when the kid ask for more they tell them no. My kids eat before I do. If they are still hungry I give them food off my plate. When a parent beat their kids in the middle of a store I want to beat that parent. There is a time & place for everything"
" Yes I have judged others parenting, or non-parenting skills! In my job I get to see and hear all kinds of good and bad situations. I don't always know what going on, just what people tell me. But some stories I have been told are just absolute crazy!!!"
" I try not to judge. I see and read stuff that I don't agree with. I don't know the circumstances behind everything that goes on in someone else's life. I may comment or have a opinion but I try not to be hateful or hurtful. I know I was judgy when I was younger and definitely before I was a parent myself."
" I am the most judgmental person ever, and don't want to be. But since I still am, grab the popcorn and a beer and lets judge everyone for an hour or two. HA! No, in all seriousness, yes I'm guilty of it. Parents who don't prioritize their children make my skin crawl, and parents who are overly permissive make my skin crawl. And people who choose spouses over their children, or who LEAVE THEIR CHILDREN IN HOT CARS make my blood boil. Also people who dress their children in ridiculous garb. Its like "Hello? That is a child not a fecking doll!" Where's the popcorn?"
I didn't ask if they choose to vaccinate or if their children were bottled or breast fed cause honestly none of that matters when it comes to being a parent. Choices like using a Harness on a 2 year old or getting your daughters ears pierced will one day not matter at all. Its the things we teach our children and the example we set for them that will shape the person they will turn out to be.
THANK YOU TO EACH OF THE 15 PARENTS FOR THEIR HONESTY!
I will tolerate no Negativity towards any questions or answers !!!
The answers people gave me were very honest and they opened a part of themselves for me to see that I didn't expect. The fear of being judged out weighed the benefits of helping a friend. (ME!) I was moved by the emotion I read and heard in some of the answers . Each person I asked is different Some only have 1 child and some are raising a neighborhood of kids. Some are stay at home parents and some work 12 hour shifts. Some have small children and some have grand children. Some are financially stable and some struggle every day .. The one thing each one of them had in common is They all love the children in their lives.
- 1. Do you worry if you are being a good parent?
Every single day of my life, but my mother reassures me that means I am a good parent. I second guess everything as for some reason, my brood did not come with instructions. It does get easier as they get older, even though it also gets more difficult."
"No I do not worry about being a good parent, I feel with everything I have been though in life, I make sure to provide and do for my kids."
" all of the time what parent doesn't? ? The Caseworker for my Foster children's tells me I'm doing a great job."
- 2. Was you scared of becoming a parent, if so why?
"No I was never scared of becoming a parent until my 2nd child was born 16yrs after my first! Things have changed a LOT in that time."
" I was not scared of becoming a parent. I was READY. I was ready to teach, learn, and experience life in a whole new way with my child. Every day is a blessing. The one thing I am scared of being a parent is because of death. I am scared of her leaving this earth. I am scared of me leaving this earth. I want to see her grow up. I want to see her go to school, college, get married, have children of her own. I want to be a grandmother. I want forever with her."
" I drank an 18 pack of beer the night my wife took her pregnancy test. We had been trying to get pregnant for 5 months and had stopped trying and decided to be traditional and get married first. She was late and her boobs hurt. I was terrified we would be pregnant and terrified we wouldn't be. The next ten months I really focused in on how "my story" was no longer about "me." That is an incredibly disheartening and terrifying prospect...until you meet your child and realize everything has changed in the most wonderful way."
- 3. What is 1 thing that you said you would never do as a parent but ended up doing any how?
"I said I would never be one of those parents who would cuss at or yell at my child. I am not proud of it but I am guilty. Damn she can really get me pissed off!"
"
letting her cry it out, she expects to be the center of my attention all the time and I still have to clean house and cook and work"
" Screaming and hollering at the kids all the time and cussing them"
- 4. Has anyone ever criticized you for your parenting choices? If so what choice was it?
" My ex-wife sometimes was not happy with the way I chose to punish our child. Its only because she never had discipline as a child and did not agree with it."
" Yes by my mom. For the non stop screaming etc"
" yes I was judged by a mentally ill narcissist who was looking for something ANYTHING to criticize me because she knows being a parent is the most important element to my life and to my self. She said I yell at my kids too much. I yell, it is true, but it is NOT in any way out of the ordinary or inappropriate or unreasonable."
" yes the drunk couple up the street that don't have any kids. They tell me I need to put my kids on a harness because I let them run wild. I let them play outside & ride their bikes up & down the street. I let them play in the street because our neighborhood is so quite the only peeps that come down our stretch is the people that live on my block. I let them draw with chalk in the street.. I am outside with them when they are out there.I don't let them disrespect others or their property so F- them assholes"
- 5. Have you ever had a "bad parent" moment? If so what was it?
" yes I feel horrible when I let her cry it out and can't devotee 100% of my attention to her"
" I have gotten upset before and "blew up" before using my head. It was hard, but my child and I learned from the situation"
" She fell off the bed when she was three months. I found her struggling to stay above water when I forgot to turn the bathtub water off and turned away for a sec when she was around 2. That was a horrible what if moment. I have hurt her feelings when I am sarcastic with her on her duh moments. Sometimes I want to treat her like an older child and she isn't."
" I dropped the f bomb. Then dropped it again realizing I dropped it. I was not proud. "
"Yes. My daughter drew her fist back at me when she was 5 and my first reaction was to defend myself and I open handily smack her across the face."
- 6. Have you ever judged someone else's parenting choices? ...
" yes I have. We have been in a restaurant while the parents are pigging out & make their kids share a meal. Then when the kid ask for more they tell them no. My kids eat before I do. If they are still hungry I give them food off my plate. When a parent beat their kids in the middle of a store I want to beat that parent. There is a time & place for everything"
" Yes I have judged others parenting, or non-parenting skills! In my job I get to see and hear all kinds of good and bad situations. I don't always know what going on, just what people tell me. But some stories I have been told are just absolute crazy!!!"
" I try not to judge. I see and read stuff that I don't agree with. I don't know the circumstances behind everything that goes on in someone else's life. I may comment or have a opinion but I try not to be hateful or hurtful. I know I was judgy when I was younger and definitely before I was a parent myself."
" I am the most judgmental person ever, and don't want to be. But since I still am, grab the popcorn and a beer and lets judge everyone for an hour or two. HA! No, in all seriousness, yes I'm guilty of it. Parents who don't prioritize their children make my skin crawl, and parents who are overly permissive make my skin crawl. And people who choose spouses over their children, or who LEAVE THEIR CHILDREN IN HOT CARS make my blood boil. Also people who dress their children in ridiculous garb. Its like "Hello? That is a child not a fecking doll!" Where's the popcorn?"
I didn't ask if they choose to vaccinate or if their children were bottled or breast fed cause honestly none of that matters when it comes to being a parent. Choices like using a Harness on a 2 year old or getting your daughters ears pierced will one day not matter at all. Its the things we teach our children and the example we set for them that will shape the person they will turn out to be.
THANK YOU TO EACH OF THE 15 PARENTS FOR THEIR HONESTY!
I will tolerate no Negativity towards any questions or answers !!!
Confessions of a Bad mom
At the very young age of 17 4 tests all showed the same thing , I was going to be a mother. .. I had no plans on being a mom, honestly the thought of being a mother scared the shit out of me. Even as a very young kid I swore I never wanted any babies, so when I played dolls with my sister I was always just the baby sitter. One Christmas My parents bought me this "feel so real" baby doll that looked just like a new born baby. Back then most baby dolls didn't look real, they would be the size of a 6 month old, but with the hair of a 10 year old. This baby was bald and wrinkly, it weighed exactly 5 pounds and had bones inside its soft gel filled skin. I named the baby Nicole then I beat the baby for crying to much and hung it upside down to watch the gel move to its head giving it a fat face. This was my favorite baby solely because my sister wanted it, and I wouldn't let her have it. The only part about having that baby doll that I liked was having a excuse to buy real baby stuff from the consignment shop next door. I spent every penny I got buying a baby stroller and car seat then hid the Doll under my bed and strapped my cat into the stroller and went walking.
When My sister and I got too old to play with Baby dolls she started baby sitting. She would baby sit every kid in the neighborhood. People would talk about how she was made to be a mother. she had that caring, nurturing side to her that I lacked. While my sister was day dreaming about a family of her own and playing with the neighbor kids I was off in the woods with my new Daisy Cobra BB gun shooting black birds, or sneaking into a pond to try and catch a catfish. I wanted to be one of the guys not stuck at home with some baby.
I was so sacred my whole pregnancy That I had night mares about forgetting to feed him, or leaving him some where. I met other pregnant women at the doctors office who were begging to be induced so excited they couldn't wait to meet their new baby. I on the other hand was begging for 1 more month. 10 months just wasn't enough time to prepare to be a mother. Most women had their whole lives to think about what kind of mom they wanted to be I only had 10 months and most of that was spent helping my at the time boyfriend ( who later became my husband) rebuild a motor in his truck. I would sit there and look at all the new baby stuff I had, and cry. How does the car seat go again? Why didn't they give me one of those planned parenting fake babies to practice with? I was so scared and I just knew I was going to be a horrible mother.
At 41 weeks and 6 days into my pregnancy nature kicked in and I couldn't stop it. I cried looking into my own mothers eyes saying " I just want to keep him inside me where I know he is safe" I begged the nurse to just let me go home I promised to come back when I was ready. I was a emotional wreck so much so that I was given a Arbys cheddar melt and a sleeping pill. 18 hours later I became a mother ( oh yeah that boyfriend became a daddy but he is not part of this story ). As soon as I seen my son for the first time I was no longer scared to be a mom.
He was 3 days old at his first doctors appointment and the nurse called me up to the window. Every parent in there was staring at me but I had no idea why until the nurse pointed out that I had forgot my baby! I left him sitting in his car seat sitting on a bench, oh god it was all true I am going to be a Bad mom!!!
14 years and 2 kids later, I was called a bad mom for the first time. Here I was so proud of myself 14 years of being a mother and social services didn't know me by name. 14 years and everybody was still in one piece including myself. I had never been called a bad mom before . It wasn't so much the words of the 10 + lynch mob moms on facebook as much as it was the reason they called me a bad mom. They didn't know that I left my newborn baby on a bench, or that I clipped his skin the first time I cut his finger nails. They didn't know that I rode around one day without my middle sons car seat buckled into the car . These judgmental moms didn't know that I let my kids ride a bike without a helmet. They didn't know that I once knocked my daughters front tooth out on the slip in slide or that I let my kids listen to Waylon Jennings and Kid rock.
These women who felt the need to cut me down had no clue what mistakes I had made as a mother All they knew was I was different and that made me a bad mom. They didn't care about all the things I had done right with my kids they only cared about the one thing they felt I done wrong. The moment I was labeled as a Bad Mom nothing else I said mattered and these lynch mob moms waited for me to say something so they could personally attack me again and again. Never tell people you clean your kids room! according to those women I am raising lazy children who will grow up to live off the government or end up in prison..
I choose to start the page Confessions of a Bad Mom not only to say F-you to the bitchy picture perfect moms with a closet full of their own parenting mistakes but also to give other parents a place to laugh at my mistakes with me and know they will not be judged for their own. I dont care what mistakes you have made as a parent as long as you don't have a kid tied up some where ( no longer than a hour if they are a teenager) Its not my place to judge someones parenting, I think we do that enough to ourselves in the mirror every day .........
When My sister and I got too old to play with Baby dolls she started baby sitting. She would baby sit every kid in the neighborhood. People would talk about how she was made to be a mother. she had that caring, nurturing side to her that I lacked. While my sister was day dreaming about a family of her own and playing with the neighbor kids I was off in the woods with my new Daisy Cobra BB gun shooting black birds, or sneaking into a pond to try and catch a catfish. I wanted to be one of the guys not stuck at home with some baby.
I was so sacred my whole pregnancy That I had night mares about forgetting to feed him, or leaving him some where. I met other pregnant women at the doctors office who were begging to be induced so excited they couldn't wait to meet their new baby. I on the other hand was begging for 1 more month. 10 months just wasn't enough time to prepare to be a mother. Most women had their whole lives to think about what kind of mom they wanted to be I only had 10 months and most of that was spent helping my at the time boyfriend ( who later became my husband) rebuild a motor in his truck. I would sit there and look at all the new baby stuff I had, and cry. How does the car seat go again? Why didn't they give me one of those planned parenting fake babies to practice with? I was so scared and I just knew I was going to be a horrible mother.
At 41 weeks and 6 days into my pregnancy nature kicked in and I couldn't stop it. I cried looking into my own mothers eyes saying " I just want to keep him inside me where I know he is safe" I begged the nurse to just let me go home I promised to come back when I was ready. I was a emotional wreck so much so that I was given a Arbys cheddar melt and a sleeping pill. 18 hours later I became a mother ( oh yeah that boyfriend became a daddy but he is not part of this story ). As soon as I seen my son for the first time I was no longer scared to be a mom.
He was 3 days old at his first doctors appointment and the nurse called me up to the window. Every parent in there was staring at me but I had no idea why until the nurse pointed out that I had forgot my baby! I left him sitting in his car seat sitting on a bench, oh god it was all true I am going to be a Bad mom!!!
14 years and 2 kids later, I was called a bad mom for the first time. Here I was so proud of myself 14 years of being a mother and social services didn't know me by name. 14 years and everybody was still in one piece including myself. I had never been called a bad mom before . It wasn't so much the words of the 10 + lynch mob moms on facebook as much as it was the reason they called me a bad mom. They didn't know that I left my newborn baby on a bench, or that I clipped his skin the first time I cut his finger nails. They didn't know that I rode around one day without my middle sons car seat buckled into the car . These judgmental moms didn't know that I let my kids ride a bike without a helmet. They didn't know that I once knocked my daughters front tooth out on the slip in slide or that I let my kids listen to Waylon Jennings and Kid rock.
These women who felt the need to cut me down had no clue what mistakes I had made as a mother All they knew was I was different and that made me a bad mom. They didn't care about all the things I had done right with my kids they only cared about the one thing they felt I done wrong. The moment I was labeled as a Bad Mom nothing else I said mattered and these lynch mob moms waited for me to say something so they could personally attack me again and again. Never tell people you clean your kids room! according to those women I am raising lazy children who will grow up to live off the government or end up in prison..
I choose to start the page Confessions of a Bad Mom not only to say F-you to the bitchy picture perfect moms with a closet full of their own parenting mistakes but also to give other parents a place to laugh at my mistakes with me and know they will not be judged for their own. I dont care what mistakes you have made as a parent as long as you don't have a kid tied up some where ( no longer than a hour if they are a teenager) Its not my place to judge someones parenting, I think we do that enough to ourselves in the mirror every day .........
Sunday, July 13, 2014
A Trashy Situation
Every wonder what impact you will have on the world around you?
My family of 5 produces on average 4, 30 gallon bags of trash a week
. That doesn't seem that bad , that is like a bag every other day. I don't have
trash service ,since there is a county dumpster site 2 blocks over . Once a week
I load up our trash and go throw it into the dumpster, and never think about it
again. I have never added up how many bags that is in a year or in a life
time. I have never thought about where that dumpster goes or where my weekly
trash ends up.
My family has never recycled except for metal. I have seen the little symbols all over everything but have given very little thought about it ,except Once a week when I take our trash to the dumpster . When I see these people with their bags of plastic bottles and boxes of cardboard trowing it into special bins I think I should recylcle. By the time I get back home I think , I am just 1 person, 1 little family how can I make that big a difference just by recycling.
My family has never recycled except for metal. I have seen the little symbols all over everything but have given very little thought about it ,except Once a week when I take our trash to the dumpster . When I see these people with their bags of plastic bottles and boxes of cardboard trowing it into special bins I think I should recylcle. By the time I get back home I think , I am just 1 person, 1 little family how can I make that big a difference just by recycling.
This is my county's landfill Which happens to be 550 acres of already used and ready for more trash land. This is where my 208 bags of trash end up each year. Where you can visible see paper, plastic glass , rotting food, old clothes
and half broken furniture form little mountains. Off in the distant is
beautiful rolling grass covered hills that are Beautiful to see but have a ugly
truth that hides beneath. They are nothing more than dirt covered trash piles.
A big mountain of trash is not the impact I want to make in the world. This is not what I want to leave behind for my children. I know that my recycling will not make a big impact on the trash piles across America but if I start recycling now and then my 3 children will recycle and their children, it starts to add up and make a big impact.
What impact will you leave on earth?
All of these photos were taken by me on 7/12/2014
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